Wednesday, November 4, 2009

Need Your Opinion

So...I have a question for ya.

Do you think I am trying to be controlling? In July (don't remember the exact time frame but around there), I decided that I would have my son, Jackson's, first birthday party on Dec. 5th.

I decided on this date because I am due to have Baby #2 on November 20th, and I wanted to make sure that his birthday celebration wasn't canceled because I was in the hospital.

In July, I let my sister and father in law know of the specific date so they would be able to be there. My sister lives in Colorado (a couple states away), and my father in law often goes hunting over the weekends in November/December.

My father told me yesterday that I was trying to control other peoples schedules by having his birthday party about 20 days after his actual birthday party. Do you agree or disagree?

My family and I have had some difficult times dealing with my sister. My sister, Jessica, and I do not get a long. We tolerate each other, but we try to communicate as little as possible. It is kind of a long story, but we have been dealing with this for years. The "peak" of dislike (I don't really dislike her, but I am struggling for an appropriate word) was in Jan. 2008....and it has really been downhill since then. I feel that my parents shelter her because of some of the choices that she has made in the past, and try their best to not upset her.

Anyway, maybe I will explain more of my sorted family past in the future.....but, do you think that I am trying to be controlling? I would appreciate any and all advice ;o)


  1. How is that controlling? You gave everyone plenty of notice. It's not too hard to schedule one day in a whole five months or so. You are definitely not being controlling. Good luck with that situation! :)
    Good luck with the delivery!

  2. You are not being controlling at all!! I totally can relate to the situation. My 1st daughter's birthday is June 19 and my second daughter was born June 17. My family thought I was trying to get out of having a party for my 2 yr old. So not true. Words were said and now I know who my true family is.

    You are doing what you can and I think it is fine. If they can't be there when you gave them that much notice, then that's their problem. Sorry!!!!! But that's the way I feel.

    You don't need this kinda stress right before you are gonna have a baby.

    Hope you get something figured out. If you need to vent or anything please email me anytime.


  3. I don't think you're being controlling - you let everyone know ahead of time when the party was going to be. I am sorry you don't have a good relationship with your sister, I do think its great that she is at least willing to come to Jacksons party. My advice is just to try and let it go, if they come great if not then I'm sure he'll have an awesome party.

  4. I say he's your child, you get to pick when the party is- obviously you have good reasons for having the party after his bday! I would just tell them this is when your party is and if they want to some they are welcome, if not maybe they would have something at their house and invite you guys? Assuming you live close... Good Luck, a first bday should just be fun not so stressful :)

    So does this mean your daughter could possibly be born on your son's bday? :)

  5. Thanks everyone for the great thoughts!

    Yes, Madelyn could be born on Jackson's birthday. I am due Nov. she can come anytime. Today would be nice ;o)

  6. You can have that baby's birthday anytime you want, if they come they come, but you have to schedule it when it's best your your little family with the new baby on the way.

  7. I agree with everyone else - you can have the party whenever you want since he's your child! My in-laws often have a birthday party for their two youngest girls in the middle of their birthdays (2 weeks after one, 2 weeks before the other) since they like to have pool parties and they have to rent the pool!

    You're being completely reasonable - and if they don't want to come, they're the ones who are missing out! :) And, you really don't need a million extra things happening when you have a brand new baby at home too....

    Besides, last time I checked, giving people advance notice was considered the polite thing to do, not controlling!

    Clear Skies,

  8. I wouldn't worry much about it. They either shut up and come or shut up and don't come. That's all there is to it.

    WHERE'S THAT BABY?!??!?!?!


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